9/13/2003
Where do I begin? It looks as if this dream is finally beginning to become a reality. Now if I could only get this site overhauled, I would be much more ahead. Please help if you can anybody.I have been preparing to participate in a documentary directed by Edo Bertoglio for some time now. The documentary will be about NY artists and what their lives are like now. His first version was called Downtown 81. This is part two. Basquiat was in the first one. There were two gigs recently. One at Chez Suzette and one at Hannahs Lava Lounge. The booker at Chez Suzette chose to put me in a very late time slot. There was a small turn out because of the time slot. Edo decided to shoot a small piece in the Chez Suzette lounge. He asked me all sorts of questions related to my craft. Girard, the manager(?), was there and he was so helpful as he always is. I treasure all of the people and experiences I have been able to have as a performer. The audience was great at both shows especially at Hannah's Lava Lounge. The film crew filmed the entire performance. I was not nervous once we began. I was a little stressed. My players were wonderful. The film crew also shot footage at my day job and all of my coworkers participated. My goal now is to have a gig every night whereby my players and I are paid well. I want to increase my following.Also, to make a new demo.I want to Thank God for all that he has blessed me with. I am alive. I have a great boss who is supportive of my dream.God gives me strength to pursue it.My roommate is awesome.God is good.

7/27/2003
This weekend was fun. I spent time with some friends and that is always nice. I am looking for a special venue to shoot a documentary in September so if you know of a good venue, please email me and let me know. Time is flying by. The Chez Suzette gig is coming up very soon. My players are great! Rehearsals have been fun. It is always a great relief to work with competent players.

There are many more loves to be experienced and written in song I guess.

This site will be completely redone. Please email all of your suggestions.
I look forward to singing full time and learning all I can in the process.Thank God for Fog. Fog is my roommate's dog who I have become a second mom to. He is always there and that is comforting.

See you at the next show.

7/19/2003
Love is in the air. I will not say who it is with, but he will inpsire me to write some brilliant material. People really come in and out of your life. I am preparing for the next show. Leo and Alan will play well. They put me at ease. The show will be a success. There are a lot more press kits to be put together in pursuit of September gigs. I am always happy to do what I love. Until the next show. See ya.

5/8/2003
Stronger than ever! I performed last night at Showtime at the Apollo's amateur night. The crowd was all over the place literally. All of us had to wait downstairs in the green room so we were not able to hear the other performers. One by one, contestants came down to tell us how that the crowd would begin booing them as soon as they walked onto the stage. They were tough. There was a lot of comradery backstage. Everyone supported each other. I was the second act after intermission. They booed me as soon as I walked out the stage. There were people clapping and standing up saying," yeah" and there were other people booing. Then I heard the famous siren blaring. We were instructed beforehand that we were to stay on the stage until we heard that siren. I managed to get to the last phrase of my song before the siren blared. I feel very strong after having faced that audience. I joined a famous group of people last night.
A blind man won the competition by the name of Jay. He sang a gospel song. He was fun to watch.
Here is something I read on another site
"Past acts scorned by Apollo spectators, who are more audacious than ancient Roman Colosseum crowds, include Grammy winner Lauryn Hill, Luther Vandross and the Godfather of Soul, James Brown." So, it was fun. I added another notch on my performance belt last night. There IS no business like show business. This is my life and I love it. It is onto the next performance.


4/11/2003
Dear Journal,
My roommate suggested that I go to Monique's book signing event at Barnes and Noble near my job. Monique is the host of the televised show, “ Showtime at the Apollo” which features Amateur Night. I bought her book Skinny Girls are Evil. That is so funny! She was very nice. I told her that I will be performing at Showtime at the Apollo in May and she put her hand to mine. I asked her if she ever spoke to the producer named Vanessa and she said that she only spoke to the Apollo people on the day of the show’s taping. I asked her if she spoke to Vic and she said yes. I gave her my CD and she said that she would listen to it. I forgot that she was going to be at Barnes and Noble. My roommate was sweet enough to bring my CD to me at my job. She brought her dog. They both had their adorable yellow rain coats on. It helped a lot to see them before I went to on way to Barnes and Noble. Seeing them with their smiling faces put me in great spirits, which is important if you are going to be BOLD. HA! HA! I also saw Chris Rock at the drug store in my neighborhood. It was about a week ago. He had his headphones on, so I thought it was a perfect moment to give him my CD. If nothing else, a lot of celebrities will be listening to my music. HA! HA!


4/9/2003
Dave and I performed at Hanna's Lava Lounge Monday night. Dave was on time. In fact, he was early. It had snowed all day. There were just a few people in the bar, but everyone was attentive and supportive. They were a very warm audience. It was a "tip jar gig." The tips were very nice and helped to reimburse my out of pocket costs for Dave. He did a good job. I will look for some other venues to perform at. If anyone reads this and thinks of a nice room, please let me know, I am open to suggestions and would like to be compensated if anything to cover my musicians costs. It was a great release to sing. I was a bit nervous about performing my originals. I always get a little nervous and think I will forget the lyrics, but I never do. They say if you don't get nervous, you don't care anymore. I believe that. Kris, one of the other performers at Hanna's, suggested that I perform at Cafe Suzette. I spoke to the booking agent today and she will look at my site. It looks like a very nice room according to their website. Work went smoothly today. My boss is very supportive and I hope to be able to invite him to a very nice gig, but I want to be sure that the venue is of his caliber.There are three more days left in the work week.I look forward to the next performance,because you are only as good as your last performance.I have many more in store.

4/6/2003
Dave and I went over the songs today. He is a very good guitar and easy to work with which is always an important trait. God I am looking forward to the day when I can perform on a full time basis. I am a performer. I AM A PERFORMER! I do not belong any place but on the stage.We will perform at 8:30 tomorrow night. I am not going to promote this first show. We will see how it goes . It is supposed to snow tomorrow. March weather is all over place on New York.

4/5/2003
Hello Journal! Hello World! It is getting closer to the Apollo show. I guess it will get more exciting as the day creeps up on me. I will be visiting my Grandfather from Good Friday to Easter Monday. He lives in Alabama. Ahh the south...Confederate flags and food galore.It will be wonderful to see him. He is getting older and it is important to hear his stories. There is a lot of wisdom and strength there. I feel more and more tired every day and hope that once my steady gigs begin, there will be a new gust of energy as I physically remind myself where my heart lies. Sometimes I feel a bit dead inside and that is when I know I have to sing. A bit of you always dies when you are not living what you love. I will go over the songs with the guitar player tomorrow and perform at Hannahs Monday. Cool! The dream is a journey.

3/29/2003
Hi! I am still alive and kicking. I am starting to feel more and more exhausted on the weekends. I miss my musicians in Sweden quite a bit. The Apollo is just around the corner and in the mean time I would like to perform at a men's bar around the corner from my apartment. That will be a fun gig.It is a tip jar gig.So, I will pay my guitar player. My day job will allow me to pay for my musicians,but I am really feeling drained today. It would be good to see some family now. Well, if this goal was easy, it would not be worth anything.

3/6/2003
Since my last entry, I decided to audition for Apollo's Amateur Night again. This time I was prepared.My roommate was kind enough to let me borrow her beach chair and a wool blanket.The auditions were set to begin at 10am on the 1st of March. I arrived at about 8am. There was a small group of people standing in line.I set up the aqua colored beach chair and made myself at home.I listened to some new age music Leo had given me which was really comforting. I waited to be seen from 8am until noon. The final waiting room is right outside of where people are actually auditioning. You could hear all the singers. There are so many people that can sing.The woman that auditioned before me sang "Dr. Feel Good." She was great! What a wonderful inspiration to follow. They called my number 53 and I sang "Miss Celies Blues" acapella. They stopped me just before the end of the song and asked me to sit next to the judges. It was nice to see familiar faces. It was reassuring. Ron B. shook my hand. He told me congratulations and said I had been chosen to be a contestant on the non-televised amateur night. He gave me the necessary instructions. I said thank you and could only think of going to sleep. My tension headache was in effect or as I like to say, my good luck headache was working. It reminds me that I still care even if I feel a bit blaze about the business at times.

2/2/2003
The journey continues. The older I get I realize just how small the world is. How we are all experiencing similiar lives.The more we talk to each other, the more we learn. I sang with Baby tonight. The audience was very reserved. Since my last entry, I made two audition tapes. One for "Showtime at the Apollo" and the other for "Star Search." They are en route now. It will be interesting to see if anything comes from them. It seems to be a long journey. Thank God for true friends and the love of family on this road.I am going to see the Pretenders this Thursday. It should be another dose of inpiration. New York is full of inspiration hits if you can take the ride.