You must fall down before you can walk

For years, my songwriting partner, has urged me to back myself up on guitar. Today, I found the courage to actually do it. I have played guitar for years writing my songs behind closed doors. I have played to explain to the musicians what I hear in my head. Today, I played at a small cafe in Edmonds, WA called Cafe Louvre. It was nerve wrecking. I am used to being surrounded by my musicians backing me up. This was a totally different feeling. It felt awkward. Especially the first 2 songs, but after that, it felt better. I still feel most comfortable just singing, but I respect my songwriting partner and figure there must be something to him so vehemently believing this is something I must do. So, the first time, although rocky is down. I have walked over the coals. Now to go back again. Moving to the great northwest to be closer to my mother feels interesting. There are many times that I miss aspects of New York and tonight I missed having my drummer/ songwriting partner there with me playing alongside me, but on the other hand, I am gaining loyal fans who I really appreciate. My mother and step-father came out to show their support.

Changes

All my life experiences change my outlook and how I relate to life and people. The weird thing is his cruelty has inspired me even more. He thinks we musicians should get "real jobs". Anyone that downs you or your passions is not truly living. I call it emotional meat that gets added to my bones. I sing songs with a different timber and color. I don't know if you ever are able to forget or stop completely loving someone.

I went to support some friends in the circle I call it. It is either people I have worked with or friends of musicians that I respect. Musicians that are the full package. Good people who also happen to be great musicians.

The gig was great. It was at Barnes and Noble. I only wish I could have heard his, Tomas's, vocals more. Danny Sadownick played with his soul.His eyes closed as he got into the style of Tomas. The mic was not hot enough,because he was standing up playing his guitar and he is so tall. But you could hear that his songs are very strong and that the band is tight. There were also other performers like Allan Harris He was so smooth like Nat King Cole. He was clean in the black,southern since of the word. Very polished indeed. Every song was beautiful. When you see any of my peers, you will not have missed a minute of your life. They are the cream of the crop. If you like music. Support these guys and of course me. :)

Since when is my next show.I am paying off an incredible amount of debt and in light of the economy, saving what I can. Changes in my life need to be made. I wish I was financially capable of making all of them I want to right now,but it will work out. It has to work out. It costs money to pay my musicians. They have bills like I do.

I am writing new material from these experiences, from what I see,and from what I observer others' experiencing. It is a shedding if you will.I have been going to jam session to stay vocally active. Use it or lose it. I am meeting more great musicians and people that support art.

Let the good times roll, right Georgia.

I miss the way it was, but know it has to be different. "Life is Change," someone once told me. Sometimes change hurts, just like working out,just like a woman giving birth.